Marwari Wedding

Marwari weddings in Rajasthan are usually traditional elaborate affairs. Royal Marwari weddings tend to become grander and even more ostentatious, and then the pre and post wedding functions could well stretch for days on end.

However, even a simple Marwari wedding in Rajasthan is just as elaborate as tradition and customs take precedence over everything else.

The wedding process follows age-old custom and we have attempted to explain all the ceremonies.

1. Match-Making
Foremost is the part of matchmaking for the marriage alliance. Utmost care is taken in this delicate matter so that the alliance is perfect. First, the status of the families have to be at par, the Marwari clan must be taken into consideration since the bride and the groom should hail from separate clans. Then, the horoscopes have to be approved and tallied by the family astrologer. Marwaris, as a rule, marry only within the community. However, exceptions are made if royals are involved.

2. Ceremonies
The Official (Engagement) Ceremony
The official (engagement) ceremony takes place at the home of the groom. Only the bride’s father, brother and other close relatives attend this ceremony. This is a strictly all male affair. No ladies, not even the bride, accompany the menfolk for the tika. The ceremony is so called because the bride’s brother actually ap plies a tilak to the groom’s forehead and makes the alliance or engagement official. A sword, other presents, clothes, fruits, sweets etc., are given to the groom.

Ganapati Sthapna & Griha Shanti Ceremony
However, there is no ring ceremony while Ganapati sthapana & griha shanti is the second most important ceremony performed usually a few days prior to the wedding. A havan is performed by the groom or bride’s parents to propitiate the gods and an idol of Lord Ganapati is installed. All ceremonies commence only after the sthapana (installation).

The pithi dastoor is one of the first important ceremonies, which involves the bride/groom and continues until the day of the wedding. The actual ceremony consists of application of turmeric and sandal wood paste to the bride/ groom who cannot leave the house once the pithi starts. The pithi dastoor at the bride’s house is an elaborate affair. The bride dresses in an orange poshak (Rajasthani dress) and is then brought under a silken canopy, which is held with the help of swords at the four corners by four ladies who must belong to the same clan as the bride. She is brought to the ladies gathering, who then apply the paste to her.

Mahira Dastoor
The mahira dastoor is yet another important ceremony, common to both the bride and the groom’s families. This ceremony is performed by the maternal uncle of the groom/bride, who, along with his wife and family, arrives with much fanfare, and is received by the bride/groom’s mother with the traditional welcome. The uncle then gives clothes, jewellery, sweets etc., to the entire family. The ceremony signifies that since at the time of a wedding there is considerable expenditure, it is the duty of the brother to help his sister at her child’s wedding.
Janev Ceremony
The janev ceremony, where the sacred thread is given to the would be groom on the eve of his becoming the house-holder, is interesting. The janev is given only to men. The groom has to be dressed in saffron robes like an ascetic and perform a havan before wearing the thread. The significance of saffron robes is that the groom now has two choices before him; either he renounces the world and becomes an ascetic, or he accepts the institution of marriage and its responsibilities. After the havan is completed and the thread given, the groom has to make a mock attempt to run from the chains of marriage while the maternal uncle must catch him and convince his nephew into accepting marriage.

Palla Dastoor
On the day of the actual wedding, or maybe a day prior to it, the palla dastoor is brought in by a few of the groom’s relatives, accompanied by family retainers, to the bride’s house. The palla dastoor consists of clothes, jewellery and gifts from the groom, which the bride has to wear during the wedding ceremony. This particular custom is typical to the Marwaris. The traditional Rajasthani poshak or wedding dress is usually red in colour, but it could also be orange, gold yellow, or pink. In certain Marwari clans, a bright parrot green is also worn. The jewellery consists of the rakhri (a circular piece of jewellery for the forehead), danglers for the ears, the timaniyaan (a choker studded with uncut diamonds) the chooda (a set of ivory and gold bangles), the bajuband or gold and stone-studded armlets, gold anklets and the bichhiya or gold toe-rings for the feet, and the nath or the stone-studded nose-ring.

The Marwari Baraat
A Marwari baraat consists entirely of male members. The bridegroom is usually dressed in a gold achkan, with an orange turban and a churidar or jodhpurs with jootis. On the turban he wears a serpech a piece of jewellery specially meant for the urban. Around the neck he wears a necklace and around the waist he ties a cummerband. Of course, variations in styles and colours prevail. The baraat members also must wear achkans or sherwanis with jodhpurs and safas colourful turbans. The procession to the bride’s house looks rather regal as there is absolutely no dancing on the streets by the baraatis. In fact, all members, including the groom who rides an elephant or a horse, carry swords. The horse is important for the Marwaris so even if he comes on the elephant, at in style by the bride’s family again, only by the male members.

3. Actual Wedding Ceremony
The groom is taken inside to the ladies section where he is received by the bride’s mother with the traditional aarti, and then taken to the mandap for the wedding ceremony. The bridegroom is accompanies at this stage by only one married make relative and maybe his younger brother or a younger male cousin.

The wedding ceremony is similar to a Hindu wedding. However, the bride must at all times through the wedding ceremony keep her face covered by a long veil.

While the wedding is in progress, the baraat is entertained outside by the bride’s male family members. Therefore, it is mostly the women members of the bride’s family who attend the wedding ceremony. Ceremonies and other rituals, including the bidai, are similar to other Hindu marriages. However, of particular interest are certain unique rituals. For example, at the time of the bidai, a coconut is placed under the wheel of the car before the ride lifts her veil for the husband after the wedding is an important ceremony. At this stage, the groom usually gives a piece of jewellery to his bride.


4. Post Wedding Ceremony
Grihapravesh
Once the baraat returns with the newly weds, the grihapravesh takes place. The bride still wears the veil while the puja and other ceremonies take place. A few games are played between the bride and the groom. They are also common to other Hindu weddings.

Pagelagni
The day following the grihapravesh, the pagelagni takes place. This is a ceremony where the bride, still in veil, is formally introduced to all the family members of the groom who bless her and give her gifts. The veil is then finally removed.